Goals In Place

My birthday has passed and my goals have been shared, both here and in a lengthier discussion with Jeff this past Wednesday. We tried to put them in some kind of order, in terms of prioritizing what is most important to me and what is more short term versus what is more long term.

We first chatted about my weight. I know we aren’t supposed to be focused on the number but I have reached a place where I am focused and active while doing my own thing — spinning twice a week, running two or three times a week and training twice a week — and I have been extremely happy with that. The weight came off over time and I am a little wary…like if I blink, I will be five pounds up because come on…I haven’t been this weight in a good eight years. I do worry about maintaining it but at the same time, I am seeing that my body is embracing this active version of me and it’s saying ‘so far, so good.’ I don’t know how to explain it…there is an inner voice saying that it seems too good to be true but I am seeing the path ahead…that if I keep doing what I am doing, I will see that target goal weight range Jeff has been talking about.

For a while now, I have been doing my own thing. I haven’t really followed any kind of workout calendar and I haven’t really had anything to train for. With my new goal of running the Jerusalem Marathon 10k in late March, I have something new to work on and I am really excited. Besides the fact that Jeff thinks I can reach what he feels is an attainable AND maintainable weight goal, I am really looking forward to changing things up and work more on my distance and endurance. I’m not looking to run the 10k in a certain time but I do feel that with the proper training to prepare myself physically and mentally for the race, I can accomplish that goal of running the course in its entirety.

Some of my other goals are things are things we are already working on — focusing more on my core strength (although Jeff thinks I’m pretty good with that) and working on my hip mobility. I am going to invest in some yoga blocks to help me with that whole ‘sitting up, cross legged’ as I really feel that I need to work on my flexibility. I’m ready to hit the trails with Jeff when time allows us both to revisit some of the routes we have taken and enjoyed. I’m all set…let’s get after it!

Goals for 57

’I forgot to ask you about your goals for 57…’

57. That is how old I am going to be later this week. I don’t really feel 57 and I don’t really feel 56…it’s truly a number but as I approach my birthday, it’s that time of year to come up with some goals. Over the years, I have had goals that were more about getting to a certain number on the scale or racing for a certain finish time. Some goals were met successfully and others are yet to be accomplished and crossed off. I have learned over time to not think so much about a number but to consider a goal as something I can reach for and hold onto. I’m back to wearing clothes I haven’t worn in eight or nine years. I am able to hold a plank (if I really want to…but I don’t) for three minutes.

When I think now about what goals I want as I celebrate another year, I think more about what is it that I want to do…what I want to work on. I still want to do a 8-10k trail run with Jeff so let’s put that on the list. My weight has gone down to a number on the scale that I hadn’t seen in eight or nine years and Jeff and I talk about a magic number that is six pounds away from where I am today so there’s that. I want to run the Jerusalem Marathon 10k this coming spring and when I say run, I mean run the entire course….hills and all. There is a no time goal…I just want to be able to run the entire 6.2 miles without walking or stopping to take a break. How I will do that, will take some training and a lot of effort but I am up for the challenge. I want to work on my flexibility and improving that to the point where I can sit up for a stretching or yoga workout and have my knees be able to cross and touch the floor. I want to work on strengthening my core because I focus so much on my lower body with spinning and running and I prefer strength training with a focus on the upper body and so the abdominal/core area gets a little left out. I actually like it when we do a whole lot of vertical crunches and reverse crunches and v ups and butt lifts…so much more than the planks and the plank push ups.

So there you have it. I am still thinking about what else I want, goal wise but this is a pretty good start.

The Shirt Fits!

This morning, I went out for a run. Nothing too out of the ordinary…I am, after all, trying to run outside more and enjoy the weather and surroundings as much as I can.

What was pretty noteworthy about this run was I was wearing a t-shirt from a Towpath race I ran in 2019. I had placed first in my age group at that three mile race and while I didn’t get an official prize for my efforts, I always looked at that shirt of something of a special keepsake. A keepsake that hung in my closet and got worn maybe once or twice in the months after that race but then didn’t seem to fit as my body composition fluctuated, along with my weight.

I’m not sure what actually possessed me to choose that shirt when I put out my running outfit last night. I had no idea if it would fit me the right way but I didn’t put it back on the hanger and opt for something looser or baggier as I tend to do. Something pointed me towards that shirt and lo and behold, I put it on this morning and it fit! It carried me through four miles of running this morning and when I finished the run and looked at the date on that shirt, I remembered that April day where I ran my fasted three miles ever. I may not be as speedy as I was six years ago but I still have that want…that drive to be my best self.

Can’t Stop, Won’t Stop

My son got married last night and I came home from the wedding at 2:30 am, barely able to walk. I had danced up a storm and even did a few squat moves with my daughter’s friends and I knew today would be a recovery day. I would walk just to get some steps in but I wouldn’t push things.

I was up after maybe four hours of sleep and I headed out for a walk. I did one of the big hills in our neighborhood and kept a nice pace throughout, while also enjoying everything around me. I hit 3.2 miles by the time I came back to our place but I felt like I wasn’t done for the day. I looked up some easier runs on the peloton app and used the filter to find a 30 minute advanced beginner run with one of my favorite instructors, Olivia.

This run turned out to be just what I needed. There were some running drills where the range was pretty high and intense and I kept up with them for as much as I could. It pushed me but it didn’t deplete me and I can certainly move better now than I did last night! A friend of mine had cautioned me over the weekend to do absolutely nothing today…not even walking…but I couldn’t do that. I listened to my body and it was telling me that it was okay to push a little and that push was just right. I took things easier over the weekend, choosing walking as my way of movement and now I am right at it with the goal to keep on going.

Embracing My Inner Athlete

The new and improved title of my upcoming book. Things are moving along…we (myself and the publishing team at Library Tales Publishing) are working on a cover design. We chose the title, which had originally been the name of this blog but it seems that ‘You Want Me To Do What?!’ is a pretty popular title in the online book world and we all wanted to make sure this labor of love of mine will be one of a kind. We considered a bunch of titles — I had liked ‘From Not Me To Why Not?!’ at first – but after thinking about what the true message of this book is, we agreed on Embracing My Inner Athlete.

The title says it all. It’s a memoir. It’s a self-help. It’s (hopefully) an inspirational story. I wanted to share the journey of an everyday wife and mom of five who went from sedentary to Spartans and whose story is filled with the highs and lows that have come with finding her true self and embracing her inner athlete. The path has been anything but smooth but there are lessons learned in knowing that it’s never too late and nothing is truly impossible.

Who Would Have Thought?!

It’s just about a year now since I took up spinning after far too many years away and next week will be just about the time that I took my first spin class at Studio Mati. I had tried out a few classes with different instructors over the course of a week and I enjoyed the range of classes but I found certain classes to be more challenging than others and opted for what I thought as more fun and less intense.

Over this past year, I had a chance to become something of a regular spinner, taking classes two or three times a week.I found myself sitting in those more challenging classes and telling myself I could do my own thing (especially since I couldn’t hear or understand the instructors’ Hebrew commands most of the time). I gradually let go of questioning my ability to handle those more challenging classes and allowed myself to get the most out of the class which I came to enjoy so much. Sure, the instructors were as challenging as when I had first tried them out back in September of 2024 but I came to realize that I could handle things…well, most of them. I still can’t stand up and pedal slowly for more than half a second while keeping my hands off the handle bars in something of a namaste movement. I can’t quite sprint as fast as the lady in the bike to my right or pedal backwards for as fast as the guy on my left. But I show up to each class, excited to be a part of something so energetic and fun and get this — challenging!

Mistaken Identity

Last week, I was finishing my walk and a young woman said hi and started talking to me. She seemed to recognize me but I didn’t have the faintest idea of who she was but I chatted with her as if I knew her. She asked me if I was coming from a run as she’s oftentimes seen me running on our street and I said it’s been a while. I’m not sure if she thought I was someone else and for an hour or so after our conversation, I was still trying to pinpoint who she was. I never was able to figure out if it was mistaken identity on her part but I felt like we were talking about the same thing when it came to running…where do I Iike to run, how far, etc.

And then I spent some time thinking about what I said about it having been a while. It has been a while since I ran outside. Two weeks. I think about that and I wonder why I don’t run outside more. The weather was perfect….70 degrees and sunny. There was so much more to look at as I ran along the main streets and later on, the running path so why have I been opting for running on the treadmill indoors? This is a question I ask myself every time I finish a run outside and I don’t know the answer. I am always so glad that I did the run and I am on such an adrenaline high for a good hour afterwards so why have I been avoiding all of this? I know that it’s quicker and easier to just go to the gym in our building but do I really want quicker and easier?

I ran this morning with a sense of purpose and while it wasn’t one of my speedier runs, it was done with an effort and a drive that I don’t necessarily feel when I am doing a run inside. I started the run with the intention to make the most of it and I finished it, having made the most of it. I say that I needed the run more than it needed me and now that I have done it, I know that I have nothing to fear and no reason to choose the quicker and easier way. So if it really was me that that young woman has seen running through the streets…please know that you will see me back there again really soon.

Appreciating The Little Things

Seeing formation in my knee caps has been a great source of joy and excitement for me over the last several months. It’s not the same thing as seeing a drop of ounces or pounds on the scale or going down a dress size but it is a victory I have celebrated nonetheless.

This morning, I took notice of something and again…it’s not about a number I can see and count but another little victory. My legs are looking…gulp…athletic. There is an actual space between the bottom of my knee cap and the top of my front calf! There is muscle in the back of my calf! The flab that had surrounded and had filled up my kneecaps and basically attached my knees to my legs, is pretty much gone!

It really is a great thing to see the efforts of your hard work and seeing the non-scale victories is just as rewarding as seeing the scale show a lower number or going down a dress size. The number on the scale and the number on the clothes tag can fluctuate at the drop of a hat but the formation of my kneecaps are here to stay!

I Can See It

I have a dress in my closet that has been hanging in my bedroom closet that I have been wanting to wear since the one and only time I wore it on June 18, 2017. It’s a long sleeve navy full length dress from Teri Jon with a bow on one shoulder and I wore it as a beaming mother of the bride at my oldest daughter’s wedding. It was a dream of a dress and I kept it in my closet, thinking and hoping I would wear it again at a black tie wedding or a some kind of gala.

I never got to wear the dress again although I had tried it on many times and felt more and more defeated and discouraged as I couldn’t fit into it without seeing all kinds of lumps and bumps. When I wore that dress, I had just completed my second half marathon and my body had adapted pretty well to the training I had put into it. I wore that dress with pride and confidence and when I look at the pictures from that day, I can see that I was truly happy in that moment.

As we all know, my fitness journey took many turns since that day in 2017. I had several bouts of losing my motivation/mojo and I had the whole fibroid saga that led to my hysterectomy. I never ran a half marathon or trained for one, the same way that I had for my first and second and my drive often took a nose dive. I saw the scale go up as much as 34 pounds and I couldn’t blame it on building muscle or the effects of major surgery. I saw my body composition go up and down and all of that left me in a body that wasn’t the same as the one I had in 2017. I would go into my closet and try on the dress when I had a black tie event coming up on my calendar and I would feel defeated and discouraged when it didn’t fit.

I have shared how I am seeing the scale go down to a number I haven’t seen since…let’s just say, it very well might have been that June of 2017. While I haven’t gone into my closet to try on that dress and I don’t have an event in the coming months to actually wear it, I shared with Gary and later, with Jeff, that I see myself in that dress now. I just had to go through this whole journey to get myself to a place that I can allow myself to reach for something and make it happen.

It’s Not About The Number

I told Jeff I would do it…that I would get there. And today, I didn’t just get there…I went beyond there.

I have shared in my posts how I have been working at my fitness and overall health. I added a Peloton spin bike to my basement gym and it has been something of a regular thing for me to use when I am in Cleveland. Six or seven weeks later, I added a Peloton treadmill and I have been loving the app that allows me to do runs and walks and all kinds of workouts when I am away from home. My training sessions with Jeff seem to be on a whole new level where I am not quite as afraid to try something I guess I would be doing anyway (YWMTDW?!) and I am actually doing some of the movements with more ease and flexibility. So with all of this said, I have seen the scale go down 14.2 pounds since early January.

During last Thursday’s training session, Jeff mentioned a goal number he has in mind for me and he had predicted that I would be in a new decade the next morning. It sounded so doable and real but then I made a boo boo by sharing Gary’s teriyaki mushroom appetizer and the scale went up a bit instead of down. I refused to get upset over the small gain or the fact that I wasn’t where we thought I would be by a certain time. I wasn’t going to go back to June 12, 2022…when I was still a member of Weight Watchers and obsessing over the number on the scale and freaking out when I wasn’t at a certain weight at a certain point in time. In the three years since I cancelled my WW membership, I have allowed myself to be free of the shackles that binded me to the scale. Granted, I weigh myself daily but I do it with a sense of knowing that whatever that number is, I am doing everything I possibly can to live a healthier life. I am going to eat out at times and I am might even allow myself a dessert here and there but I am living a better life today than I did when I was going for those weekly weigh ins.

Today’s celebration isn’t as much about the number I saw as it was about the progress I have made with hard work and it is hard work that I can honestly see myself doing for years to come. Jeff’s target number for me is a little more than three pounds and I believe I can do it. I won’t put a date on it because that would bring me back to those WW days and I don’t want to go there. I see that number…it’s a number that I haven’t seen in several years but I see it now and then I see something more than that number…I see the person who said to herself, You want me to do what and then went ahead and did it.